D.C. Gilbert

Given the choice, there are places I’d rather visit than Chicago.  For example, Chernobyl or Marquis De Sade’s basement.  Sadly, I was forced to travel through Chicago; or as I like to call it Modor in the Midwest.

Fortunately I can limit my exposure to Chicago by rocketing through in my big redneck truck.  Aside from an economy based entirely on tollbooths and traffic jams it’s tolerable if I just keep moving.  In fact I’ve made it a game.  I never set foot in Chicago itself and go out of my way to spend as little money as possible (i.e. nothing but tolls) in the entire state.  (One has time to think of such games when they’re crawling along in Chicago traffic.)

The worst part is a feeling that I’m in enemy territory.  The place makes a libertarian’s skin crawl.  I know that gun control and taxes can’t leap…